Relationships & Anxiety
Denise Pickup MA BACP (Accredited)
Areas of work
Sometimes people seek help in a crisis; unable to tolerate the pain of where they find themselves.
Some wish to end destructive patterns. Others wish to gain personal insight and understanding
I can't offer solutions but I may be able to support you to find your own. This may develop into deeper understanding to move forward in your life. We can explore ways to help you move to a better place.
Couples Counselling
Have you reached a crisis or just wish things could be better? It's never too late to see if changes can be made with impartial skilled help.
Affairs and Betrayals can often be addressed. Communication and Conflict work can replace bickering, blame, hostility and disappointment. Sex can be good again. Trust can be rebuilt.
Love comes and goes, but if respect disappears that needs to be addressed. Sometimes destructive patterns of behaviour can be understood and replaced, but not always.
Your 'Contract' of being together can be explored in prenuptial counselling or revised to accommodate the realities and changes
Anxiety & Panic
Is Anxiety or Panic clouding your life? You may wish to manage it better. Or you may even wish to explore the origins or underlying causes.
Generalised Anxiety Disorders, Phobias, OCD and Compulsions are among the categories worked with. There are many new ways of working. Maybe we can explore the possibilities.
From feeling stuck to suicidal feelings there is often a way through to realising the best in yourself and finding a way to a more rewarding life. Why not contact me and find out?
Sometimes Anxiety tips into Depression. Or Depression hangs like a cloud after mourning or sadness have run their course. Explore options.
Relationship work
"The quality of our relationships determine our happiness and fulfillment and the sense of a life well-lived" (Dr J Sachs)
Are your relationships failing? Whether at work or within the family, we sometimes find ourselves repeating destructive patterns which stop us from being fulfilled and happy.
Sometimes we stick with familiar patterns rather than create healthier ones. Find new ways of relating; with impartial support and good techniques. Psychodynamic work is often useful.
Is your Relationship abusive? Or are you so afraid of conflict that you are unheard. There is a middle way. Understand the Drama Triangle.
Workplace Stress
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Stress is now the major reason for absence from work costing British Industry £17 billion a year. It can trigger anxiety, depression and illnesses.
Employers have responsibility to provide a 'safe system of work' to protect employees. Many now provide agency Counselling. Bullying harassmentand overload of work may put health at risk. ​
A work issue can be the final straw as fagile coping mechanisms collapse or a trauma is re-activated. There are good ways to address this through an Employer Assistance Programme.
Bullying in the work-place can undermine team efforts and can lead to illness, demotivation and absense. Please contact me for details of EAP and training courses on these subjects.
Separation Work
​Wishing to understand what has gone wrong and why? Separation Work allows you to explore without the extra pressure to repair.
Which factors are external; bereavement, loss, births, loss, redundancy? Which are the internal niggles; communication, negotiation and your contract of being a couple - ie who does what ?
Attachment patterns, conflicting family values and Lifestages are all well-established theories that offer a chance to consider what has gone wrong without casting blame. Time to reassess.
Love comes and goes in a relationship. So how do you know if it is worth investing time to repair or better to just move on? Consider the options with skilled, impartial advice.
Conflict Bullying & Anger
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​Is Anger ruining your life? Yours or someone else's? Find ways to manage Anger and Conflict. Tackle Bullying in the Workplace and Family.
Don't let conflict spoil family events or parenting after separation.​ There are effective ways to overcome conflict without giving in. Be heard and be safe with tried and tested ways.
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Domestic Violence, Controlling and Cohersive behaviour may be assessed. If a relationship has become abusive, this is usually worked with separately for safety reasons.
Is your relationship Abusive? You can find out. Or maybe you are you worried that you may be controlling? Often perpetrators can see themselves as the Victims.